This article was originally published on The Huffington Post.
Life is WILD. We talk about how insanely busy we all are and it’s probably true for the most part (Netflix and pups all day doesn’t count). Family, friends, work, exercise, home things, bill paying, dog washing, etc. You name it and we are trying to fit into our limited 24 hours (I’m being slightly facetious there, 24 hours is plenty of time, don’t be fooled). It can be hard to maintain each aspect of our life all of the time and I know because I fail on a regular basis.
Confession: I used to beat myself up when I failed…
I wanted to do well in all parts of my life all the time. That’s the overachiever in me.
As I got older, I started realizing a pattern. For a few weeks at a time, I was solid. I never missed a day at the gym, I wrote blogs (this is important for my business), I was always caught up on my work projects and I was spending great time with my family and friends. GO ME! Then, I’d start to feel burnt out, tired and really behind. I realized that being 100% in ALL parts of my life all of the time was exhausting. Not because I didn’t love what I was doing; on the contrary, I wake up every day UBER excited for the day. It’s just a LOT to do well all of the time!
When I first noticed this pattern, I felt conquered. I felt like I couldn’t handle all of the things in my life. Then I got smart. I understood that this was OKAY. It’s ok to come back down a little and retreat. It’s ok to miss a day at the gym to recover and rest. It’s FINE if you miss happy hour. If your friends love you, they’ll be there for the next one (and have one for you)! It’s absolutely 100% natural to not go hard 100% of the time. In fact, your brain and your body need a break. I find that when I embrace and allow the retreat, I do better in the things I am partaking in.
If you’re anything like me, you tend to beat yourself up and engage in a lot of self-blame when things aren’t going as great as they could. It’s not healthy folks. There’s a fine line between continually challenging yourself to be better and being overly hard on yourself when you need a break. Let it happen. You’ll be so happy you did and your future results will be even greater.
Remember, you only get one life, one body and one shot at each day to make it the best. Listen to what is best for you and embrace whatever that looks like. When it’s time to work hard and focus 125%, go for it and love every second. When it’s time to stay in, take fewer meetings and eat leftovers. Do it up!
My last piece of enlightened advice, one that is part of a larger narrative for sure, is to ask yourself if how you’re feeling is because of the things YOU choose to engage in, or if your feelings are brought on by other people. Yes, that’s right, you know who I’m talking about. The people who somehow have the magical ability to suck the positive energy out of a room. The people who are constantly skeptical of how well you are doing and how awesome you are. If the answer to this is even a possible yes, tread with caution. You are in control of you but you cannot control other people (acknowledge this now and die free, seriously). What you can control is who you choose to interact with, be around and let into your circles.
Bottom line? If you’re feeling conquered because of your own awesomeness, good job friends. You’re a master of hard work. Take a break, listen to yourself and bring it on down. If you’re feeling conquered because of other people who are not helping you feel empowered, do something about it. Here’s to feeling empowered AND a little conquered. You’re allowed to have both! Onward
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